“No matter where you’re from, your dreams are valid.”
Some other highlights from the couch: Ellen broke Twitter and Robin Meade and I had a little Tweetversation, along with Twitter Queen Maya. HLN TV also favorited some photos from our Foodie Oscar Parties, and I ate an obscene amount of this dip.
Also: Unique Vintage is featuring some of its Oscar-inspired looks this week, if you’re in the market for an awards season-inspired dress.
I just can’t get by with one weird holiday items blog post a year. Plus, it’s been two months since my last post, and that’s a cardinal sin in blogland.
So, with the latest snow storm swirling outside and in the spirit of cold-induced procrastination (Read: I don’t want to go outside), here are some of the oddest Valentine’s Day gift options I could find on the interwebs today. Sadly, it wasn’t that hard.
1. Protein Panties?
First of all, a Google search for ‘weird Valentine’s Day gifts’ actually returns a disturbing amount of items for the kinkiest of fetishists out there. Meaning you’re not so much into feet or whips and chains as you are in naughty knitting or penis-shaped cakes. In an effort to pick just one of this type of gift choices, I’ve gone with Brief Jerky, because the name is genius and I’m a sucker for anything featuring smoked meat. If you follow that link, there’s even a DIY how-to.
2. Points for Fundraising
Kudos to the Bronx Zoo for trying a holiday-themed money-maker for their important nonprofit, but they might have picked an animal slightly more cute and cuddly for adoption than a Madagascar Hissing Roach. Seriously, naming a star in the galaxy after your beloved is so last century. Over-sized insects are the ‘I love you’ of the future.
3. 12 Steps to Love
I can actually think of a few people in my life who would legitimately love this gift, and it is rather creative and crafty. Forget the cookies, candy bars, or – horror — actual flowers… give a booze bouquet. Fun fact… this idea comes to you from the hallowed halls of Illinois State University.
4. Eat my Face
If you’re still hoping to give a traditional present with a twist, there are chocolates molded into just about anything available out there. Really – think of the weirdest item you can and Google it along with the word ‘chocolate’ and you’ll find it. Here’s my latest favorite — Chocolate made to look like you and your partner’s faces. It’s a great idea, if not a little self-involved… aside though: is it me or does the couple in the photo below look like they’re experiencing some sort of allergic reaction?
5. I Love You, Now Get to Work.
For the sweetie you hope to cajole into bringing home more bacon (and yes, there’s plenty of V-Day-themed bacon out there, too), might I suggest the handmade desk organizer. Points for the need to use power tools to make it, but couldn’t it at least be in the shape of a heart? Slackers.
The winner is Natasha Clark, author of The Wicked Mrs. B!
Natasha is the founder of The Lioness Group, a full-service media relations firm in Springfield, Mass., and publishers of Lioness magazine. Natasha also manages the Partners in Education program at Springfield School Volunteers where she recruits the business community to get involved in the local school district.
It’s been another great Blogtoberfest season! Thanks to everyone who wrote, read, and voted … we’ll do it again next year.
Once again, Blogtoberfest has come to an end, and there’s only one more spider web to clear: Now it’s time to read each of these awesome posts and vote for your favorite so we can determine a winner!
We had a great number of entries covering all kinds of topics, from nostalgia for candy to haunted real estate.
Here they are – all of the Blogtoberfest Guest Post Contenders, 2013. Voting will remain open until Friday, Nov. 8.
I never thought marriage would be something I would consider, growing up and watching my parents and others I figured, Why bother?
I mean, a ring, ceremony, a parade and a lifetime of misery wasn’t something I wished to ever experience.
Like every child that says they’ll never, you find yourself saying I do.
One of the major deterrents to marriage was the wedding itself…the stuffy dress, the uncomfortable posing, the family that interferes with every detail, or the drunk bridesmaid (my usual role). The fantastic cliché photographs on the beach perfect like the perfect couple. One thing I learned from being a drunk bridesmaid, is that weddings are the most stressful for the bride in expectation of a perfect day and everything working perfectly.
My husband and I have an unconventional relationship.
We decided our wedding day should be on Halloween, because we both love Halloween. It’s one of the only days nobody cares what you are and everyone has fun being something else. We also imagine being old and senile, how could we forget that day?
We had planned to elope and have a private ceremony, we had everything we needed. When we woke up, the sky was grey, and it was cold and the air was full of foggy mist.
I decided that the day would be perfect despite that, and went about starting the day preparing myself for one of the most important days I’d never thought I’d ever have with the most amazing person.
I went to the bathroom and realized, that my perfect day was just an idea in my head when I looked at the toilet paper and the red tide rolled in. Great! So, I put on my wedding dress that fit perfectly just a week prior, and I was so bloated I could not zip the zipper! I began to panic, then flew into a rage taking off the dress, throwing it across the room, hitting the space heater, landing in the dog’s food dish with wet food in it.
I didn’t think things could get much worse, so I sat down sobbing in my stockings, and Adam sat down next to me and comforted me. He helped me put on my dress and grabbed this huge safety pin off of an old kilt I had, fastening the back for me. He said, “See, it’s going to be fine. You look beautiful.”
I guess the reason I’m writing this, is because I hear and see a lot of cynical people that don’t believe in love because they’ve been burned, or they envisioned love or marriage being a certain way. That marriage was an ownership, or just something people do because they’re supposed to.
I know I have something rare, but one of the things that makes us different, is we love each other for our imperfections, our quirks, and our understanding. Though I expected a perfect day like every girl, things didn’t go perfectly, but it was perfect with him.
We’ve had awful arguments, we learn from each other, and we communicate with each other and choose our battles. We grow together because we want to. Perfect doesn’t exist, it’s an illusion.
The right thing sometimes is wrong, and many people place more value and importance on why things don’t work, won’t work, devaluing the contract between lovers, pushing their needs and the willingness to put your own aside…marrying the wrong person or someone they thought they knew, who never was.
Everything happens to teach us something, whether it be about ourselves or others, what we want or what we don’t.
People place more value on things, than partnership, people, or interactions. Some people view people as things as well, and things get old and once something is old you get rid of it and find a new one. That is why marriage doesn’t work…mental laziness, lack of empathy and the unwillingness to communicate or compromise. The me first world with the comparing and competition with the Joneses. (who are total assholes by the way.)
I am not writing this to critique humanity and its decisions, or to compare myself to anyone else. I’m writing this because I see so many skewed misconceptions that actually devalue the essence of the rituals society adheres to. The politics, people themselves and religion have all taken a stab at the ceremony of love, making it the “marriage industrial complex.”
Perfection is an illusion, it’s surface. It’s not concrete real or attainable. It is what you learn from the imperfect things and what you do with what you learn that makes things real.
Sara Wentworth is an artist, writer, and status-quo-bunker based on Cape Cod. She and her husband Adam are the crazed minds behind Secret Society Art. Check out their stuff – but the Aldous Huxley portrait is mine