When searching for any Valentine gift, weird or otherwise, it’s hard to avoid the culinary component. We’ve already established that there’s a chocolate representation to be found out there for just about anything, and a Valentine representation for all sorts of foods: pickles, jerky, and ketchup among them.
But the annual Weird Valentines Gifts post has never been fully food-themed, so here we are — with two items inspired by snacking, one designed to help get the nosh on, and a fourth that spotlights a new entree to the global dining table.
I Love Cheesy Poofs, You Love Cheesy Poofs
Who wouldn’t love this multi-purpose plushy? It’s a pillow. It’s a toy. It’s a village of adorable Cheesy Poof People. You can’t go wrong, and could pair the puffs with an equally cute plushy boba tea for double the awwww.
Spotted at: Angleliu
These bread slippers come in baguette, butter, and “bread b,” which looks like challah to me, so missed bread-branding opportunity there.
Spotted at: The October Elf
A Whirlwind of Emotion…
This self-mixing, portable mug swirls your chocolate milk for you, which is adorable and unnecessary—just like any self-respecting Valentine gift should be.
Perfectly paired with a hand-made Nesquick tumbler.
Spotted at: The Science Toy Store
…and Edible Manchurian Scorpions.
Since the world is slowly ending and we’re moving toward eating bugs anyway, why not make it fancy? The Entomarket — just one leg of Entosense LLC in Lewiston, Maine — is a clearinghouse of culinary-grade creepy crawlies that extends far beyond your standard chocolate-covered grasshopper.
In addition to the Manchurian morsels, which incidentally glow naturally under a black-light, the Entomarket also offers Cotton Candy Crickets, Pizza-flavored Superworms from Thailand, and the very impressive-sounding Chapulines Sazonados from Mexico (grasshoppers with lemon, salt, garlic, and chile flavors).
Spotted at: Edible Insects